Terms & Conditions of Growing up (Traumatic Version)

By Yasmin Carter

By living within this household, you agree to be bound by the following terms and conditions without modification. Meals and care are provided until you start to work and make your own money. Expect to regulate and navigate your emotions on your own once you reach high school. Keeping your voice silent unless called upon is critical as no one wants to hear your concerns or how you feel

You are responsible for:

Keeping your voice at a manageable volume, no matter the parent's aggression and volume

Monitoring your teenage and adult moods with advanced emotional surveillance, you won't have guidance, so this is all up to you to figure out

Being sure that no matter the situation, you understand that the parent is always right, even when they are not

Obligations: You are required to maintain perfect grades, no Cs. You must participate in extracurriculars since the parents will be working 24/7. You will be home alone most of the time, so you are required to clean and keep the house together on your own. You are required to absorb anger that is not yours and redistribute it internally as self-doubt, insecurity, and the need to please people.

Prohibited Conduct:

Refrain from crying; penalty consists of extended timeouts and beatings, giving you something to really cry about.

Asking for reassurance, an example of that would be asking “what did I do wrong?”

Remembering too clearly: it does not matter if you know what happened detail by detail, memory leaks will be patched with denial and invalidation

The parent agrees to furnish:

Shelter

Food

Occasional affection

Occasional emotional availability

Under no circumstances should the parent be liable for:

Trust issues

Instinct to apologize before speaking

Abandonment issues

Inability to set and keep personal boundaries

The constant need for reassurance and validation

Mood and emotional instability

This agreement does not terminate upon the age of 18; it will enhance certain parts of this agreement. This agreement can only be terminated when you no longer live under the roof of the parent. By growing a sense of self and the ability to voice how you may feel effectively but be aware that this will be looked at as disrespect and you will be permitted to accept any consequences.

By signing here, you have acknowledged that you have read, understood, and accepted the terms and conditions of this childhood agreement. Please sign below: